7 Benefits of Being a Morning Person

I woke up at 6 o’clock AM to begin writing this blog. But ironically, I ended up falling asleep and not waking up until now. But I suppose if I were writing this from somewhere in the Pacific Ocean, it would still be considered early. So you have no right to call me a hypocrite.
I don’t know how some people do it, especially my mother, who gets up at 5:45 every morning, even on the weekends. I have irregular spurts of motivation that give way to another failed attempt at becoming a morning person. Maybe it just comes with age. Yeah, that’s what I choose to believe.

I'll take two with extra sprinkles

I’ll take two with extra sprinkles

1. The air tastes better: Really, it does.  I’ve found myself standing in the middle of the street sipping in the air and rinsing it around my taste buds for full effect.  It tastes somewhere in the neighborhood of vanilla and quesadillas.  It’s almost like an oxygen man comes around every night and replenishes everyone’s oxygen supply.  You know he’s coming from his signature oxygen song emanating from his oxygen truck.


2. You get to brag about how much you’ve accomplished: You know how you hated those people who were able to get all their chores done before you woke up?  Well now you get to be those people!  The best part is, when you brag about it, there’s no suitable retort that someone can toss back in your face, other than maybe, “I dreamed longer than you.”  Then it’s just game over.  Of course, most of the time, they are too groggy to even comprehend language of any form, so you can also include what you think of their new haircut.

Must. Have. Second. Breakfast.

Must. Have. Second. Breakfast.

3. You can fit in an extra meal or two: I bet Hobbits are morning people. I mean, how else could they fit in breakfast, 2nd breakfast, luncheon, afternoon tea, supper, dinner, dessert, and still have time to travel to Mordor to save the world from obliteration.  Easy answer: morning Hobbits.


4. Meet a whole new community: Morning people seem to be a whole new species of Homo sapiens.  They seem more jolly, more active, more productive than the rest of us.  Maybe its some sort of mutation, and we’ll all soon be one of their kind, Homorning sapiens. Morning people also seem to talk with more exclamation points.  See number 5 for reference.

Cats are an exception.  Of course Garfield is an exception to everything.

Cats are an exception. Of course Garfield is an exception to everything.

5. Nap with pride: In my personal experience, naps mean different things to morning people and non-morning people:

  • Non-morning person: Why am I so tired?  I just woke up an hour agoozzzzzzzzz….
  • Morning person: Well it’s been a great morning! I think I’ve earned a little nap!  Then I’ll get right on to cleaning that toilet!!!!


6. People think differently about you: People can’t hate you, only envy you for the fact that you’re a morning person.  And if they say they hate you, you know better.  So just smile, and enjoy your second breakfast.

7. This:

You wouldn't want to sleep through a cigar on the beach

You wouldn’t want to sleep through a cigar on the beach


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